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Common courtesy often absent from SNA


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I know it's not a new trend but, IMHO, it's getting worse.

Having totally changed my system recently, I have had a few items for sale. That's when it started.

The first two items sold quite quickly. Good communication from buyers, items posted promptly. I wait for confirmation of safe arrival.........nothing.

Then I get queries on other items by PM. Questions answered promptly. No 'thanks, mate'. no 'thumbs up', just silence.

One member even asked politely if I could lift the lid of a DAC for sale and take some pics. I obliged and sent him three pics. Response? Zilch. No 'thank you'. Nothin. Total silence. 

 

Maybe I'm a bit sensitive and should harden up. Maybe that's the way society works these days. It that's the case then it's a shame. Courtesy is not hard to practice and when offered, it is generally returned.  A shame it is so often missing on this forum.

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I know it's not a new trend but, IMHO, it's getting worse. Having totally changed my system recently, I have had a few items for sale. That's when it started. The first two items sold quite

You guys have no idea. I should post up some of the PMs and Emails I get multiple times per day.   Some, perhaps 25%, I don't respond to but actually go and remove their account. It takes lo

" take $800?" That's a direct quote of a PM, no hello or goodbye or name sign off.   "can buy this cheaper,I've seen one on gumtree my best offer $550." Another pm and another no n

Yes, I absolutely agree with this.

 

Happens so frequently. Just have the common courtesy to close out a conversation or enquiry. A quick thanks and I’m out of contention etc.

 

I hope people aren’t this “absent” with face to face communication.

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27 minutes ago, wolster said:

Maybe I'm a bit sensitive and should harden up. Maybe that's the way society works these days. It that's the case then it's a shame.

 

I think you are spot on about everything in your post .... including the bits I've quoted above.

 

 

BUT... perhaps not in the way you think.

 

Do know WHY people don't care to reply back, say thanks, etc? ..... because they've learned to get away with it..... because people have stopped challenging each other directly on it.

 

I would say thank you to you because I have a little voice inside my head saying "that I wouldn't want to make wolster feel unappreciated, or wouldn't want me to seem ungrateful or rude, etc. etc. etc"

 

.... but if I never get a "slap" when I forget my manners .... then I'll start to forget about it.   If you don't expect it (and "demand it"), then why would I do it?!?!?

 

 

 

IMVHO.... if they have "angered" you..... then you should (have) tactfully let them know (it's too late now, assuming 72 hours or similar has gone by).    It will improve your feelings of self-worth.... and far from being "an arse".... you're making the world a better place.   Yeah sure, some people will double down, and give you the "whatever buddy"......  but it's the letting them know your expectation which is important (and what is missing today).

 

 

What I don't think you should do.... is what I think "people these days" gravitate to instead ...... is whinge about it to everybody else.    This just promotes negativity, 'me too', and in the extreme case, solutions which target everyone including the innocent (sometimes even only the innocent) .... which we can see these days all throughout society.

 

 

 

Wow... did I just say all that?!?!  :-S .... I'm on a roll this week.

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Agree it has gone worse as SNA has grown bigger.  Far too many people do not use "common" courtesy; just the other day, I PMed someone selling something.  NO reply, twice!  There are also more flippers around, people over charging things etc. Others ask for help but getting info from them is difficult.  Yet others expect sellers to contact them.

 

Maybe it is time to name and shame these people ?  Yes, this is frowned upon, but what else is there to counter this?

 

Or maybe we should increase the number of posts and the time to qualify to access the Classifieds? There will be howls of outrage but most of those who lack "common" courtesy are people who add little to our community....

 

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4 minutes ago, Snoopy8 said:

 

Maybe it is time to name and shame these people ?  Yes, this is frowned upon, but what else is there to counter this?

 

YES!  :thumb:

 

4 minutes ago, Snoopy8 said:

 

Or maybe we should increase the number of posts and the time to qualify, to access the Classifieds? There will be howls of outrage but most of those who lack "common" courtesy are people who add little to our community....

 

 

Excellent suggestion, Snoop!  :thumb:

 

Andy

 

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55 minutes ago, davewantsmoore said:

 

 

 

What I don't think you should do.... is what I think "people these days" gravitate to instead ...... is whinge about it to everybody else.    This just promotes negativity, 'me too', and in the extreme case, solutions which target everyone including the innocent (sometimes even only the innocent) .... which we can see these days all throughout society.

 

 

 

 

Certainly not intended to be a whinge,  Dave. More an observation.

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20 minutes ago, Snoopy8 said:

Agree it has gone worse as SNA has grown bigger.  Far too many people do not use "common" courtesy; just the other day, I PMed someone selling something.  NO reply, twice!  There are also more flippers around, people over charging things etc. Others ask for help but getting info from them is difficult.  Yet others expect sellers to contact them.

 

Maybe it is time to name and shame these people ?  Yes, this is frowned upon, but what else is there to counter this?

 

Or maybe we should increase the number of posts and the time to qualify to access the Classifieds? There will be howls of outrage but most of those who lack "common" courtesy are people who add little to our community....

 

100%

 

I have had numerous instances of non replies, lack of courtesy and very poor (if any ) communication. Not forgetting low ball and insulting offers at times.

 

I have a long standing opinion that a minimum and meaningful number of posts to the community, should be a pre requisite for access to buying and/or selling in the Classifieds to avoid a virtual Gumtree system evolution.

 

What @wolster is correctly saying is NOT A WHINGE. It is  an accurate description of the falling standards of common decency and behaviour and if this  cannot be brought to the attention of the collective, then it will continue unabated.

 

Edited by rantan
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In PMs, yes this is a bit rude. But if it happens in open threads, it can sometimes be that your post was overlooked in the discussion, when it becomes dominated by cliques.

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Yeah...........maybe there should be a list of known flippers posted in a thread and then we can rate them.

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2 hours ago, wolster said:

I know it's not a new trend but, IMHO, it's getting worse.

Having totally changed my system recently, I have had a few items for sale. That's when it started.

The first two items sold quite quickly. Good communication from buyers, items posted promptly. I wait for confirmation of safe arrival.........nothing.

Then I get queries on other items by PM. Questions answered promptly. No 'thanks, mate'. no 'thumbs up', just silence.

One member even asked politely if I could lift the lid of a DAC for sale and take some pics. I obliged and sent him three pics. Response? Zilch. No 'thank you'. Nothin. Total silence. 

 

Maybe I'm a bit sensitive and should harden up. Maybe that's the way society works these days. It that's the case then it's a shame. Courtesy is not hard to practice and when offered, it is generally returned.  A shame it is so often missing on this forum.

Suck it up princess. Oh wait... sorry... how are you feeling? 

 

 

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" take $800?"

That's a direct quote of a PM, no hello or goodbye or name sign off.

 

"can buy this cheaper,I've seen one on gumtree my best offer $550."

Another pm and another no name no hello and at the time, all recent members.

 

Uninvited continual questions via pm, I've got a few of those and they won't take the hint to bugger off so you delete the convo.

 

Lots of stuff like that happens but it's just the case that this site has got large now and it's mainly a forum with the empathise on  buying+selling these days. The collegial friendly community is still here but it's mainly behind the shield of private convo's, we've made our friends we know who we like and who we don't.

 

Noobs with no manners abound as do  members with big post counts but I'm not losing any sleep over it all. It is what it is and lets be honest dealing with lowballers via PM is a lot of fun.

$800?

How about we make it $500? 

What!! Are you serious or what?!!

No. Now bugger off.

 

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The truth is @Luc that you don’t really have any kit worth more than $800. They were doing you a favour.

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6 minutes ago, Luc said:

Uninvited continual questions via pm, I've got a few of those and they won't take the hint to bugger off so you delete the convo.

 

Definitely.

 

Deleting a "conversation" stops scum sucker low ballers dead in their tracks. It is a silent, way to express one's displeasure and very effective.

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4 minutes ago, buddyev said:

The truth is @Luc that you don’t really have any kit worth more than $800. They were doing you a favour.

Here's a prime example of how standards are slipping, cruel and spiteful commentary and if the Mods were on board they'd jump on this joker and send him off to the June Dally-Watkins school of good manners and deportment.

I met him once, slovenly spiv type character, the one who when he leaves you check your silverware and small items in the third draw down

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39 minutes ago, alistairm said:

Suck it up princess. Oh wait... sorry... how are you feeling? 

 

Don't U mean "Snowflake", Alistair?  xD

 

Andy

 

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Happens quite a lot. Very Un-Australian!

I have replied with a 'You're welcome' before in PM where they should have written thanks. I do this in real life too though

 

The response 'I'll take it' in classifieds is also very poor manners. This isn't a used car lot.

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I think it is becoming a bit like telephone conversations in the movies.  Mostly an american movie thing, but they seldom say thanks, goodbye, or anything, they just hang up when they have said what they want to say.  Always seems rude to me.

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4 hours ago, Luc said:

I met him once, slovenly spiv type character, the one who when he leaves you check your silverware and small items in the third draw down

 

I have received a PM from a concerned member who quite bluntly told me that he feels that my post with this meme is racially abusive and not acceptable.

This was ,never, ever, intended in any way whatsoever and I publicly apologise for any offence this may have caused to anybody and people who know me will know that this is NEVER part of who I am.

Edited by rantan
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Don't go reading the comments on open Facebook groups if easily offended. Prob where it's coming from.

 

Happily all my experiences here have been decent, and I continue in the same way.

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I totally agree, wolster.

 

Except for being too sensitive, only relative to the borderline rude segments of out society these days, maybe not rude, but definitely lacking big time in effective communication. Edit: Actually I think it is more along the lines of the 'ME-ME-ME!' mind set of many people these days, a self centered society at large.

 

Rodney said it best!

RodneyDangerfield.jpg.0e89820329063f8377d0620fcd86430f.jpg

 

Edited by muon*
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@rantan Not so much Dickensian as East London spiv, flash harry ( No, not Yammyman...lol) and he does do a very good... "'Ullo John! Gotta New Motor?"

 

British 60s cinema - The 40s' spiv cycle

 

 

 

  https://www.slackinvestor.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/spiv.jpeg

 

 

 

 

We've all met em (even Gen XYZ)

Edited by Luc
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1 hour ago, alistairm said:

Suck it up princess. Oh wait... sorry... how are you feeling? 

 

 

 

image.jpeg

 

I'm fine thanks @alistairm Really...

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57 minutes ago, Luc said:

Here's a prime example of how standards are slipping, cruel and spiteful commentary and if the Mods were on board they'd jump on this joker and send him off to the June Dally-Watkins school of good manners and deportment.

I don’t think they can deportment him, I’m pretty sure he was born here.

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1 minute ago, cheekyboy said:

I don’t think they can deportment him, I’m pretty sure he was born here.

And you'd be wrong Keith, he's a blow in, the worst sort too. I blame Hawke of course, he had a cry over Buddyev's predicament and relaxed the border and boom! The bugger was in like Flynn

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51 minutes ago, rantan said:

 

A bit like this  eh?

 

divine decadence darling

You’re welcome

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1 minute ago, buddyev said:

You’re welcome

No problem at all.

When you have the likes of @Luc advocating for you, then you know that stuff will just happen?

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8 minutes ago, Eggmeister said:

a bit harsh

 

Errrrr.

I thought it was obvious I was joking. @Eggmeister and @buddyev

 

Please let me know if I should delete this ( and am happy to do so) but I thought this was just banter like many of the other posts in this thread.

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It was obvious.
Ignore the eggman’s foolish sensitivities. He’s hanging by a thread and should have been banned long ago.

 

though I am a little touched that he leapt to my defence.

Edited by buddyev
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1 hour ago, rantan said:

 

A bit like this  eh?

 

divine decadence darling

 

Well said rantan !!!

 

I couldn't agree more

 

Edited by Eggmeister
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3 hours ago, wolster said:

Dave. More an observation.

 

I see what you did there  ?

 

 

Yeah.... I know.... and just to reiterate I think your observations are sadly spot on.

 

Tsk.   Kids these days.  But... that being said.   Get yer elbows up, I reckon;

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What we need is a truth in posting option.

It would be called: What's actually been said or better known by it's acronym WABS

I'm sure it could be incorporated into the site with ease.

 

For instance;  Directional indicators on IC's and power cables while they look interesting stamped on the cables I think it's a subjective thing. (press WAPS button) "Your a dead set muppet if you think 240v needs to know which way to go or cares. Music comes to you backward if you put your IC's in with the arrows pointed the wrong way...you believe that then you believe in(enter whatever)

 

Squashballs under gear are great isolators and certainly beat Ceraballs or Gaii 11's. Press WAP button. Your idiots for paying that much! My squash balls come in packs of 8 for 2 bucks on FleaBay.

 

Some nice reds on display there at your GTG. WAP button. Lol, look at the Dan Murphy bargain bin bottles you tight arses.

 

Hi! Long time lurker but I thought I'd join in in this great community. WAP button.  I need to sell some stuff then you'll never hear from me again.

 

Well said  Fred !!!

 

I couldn't agree more. WAP button. Your a muppet. Couldn't disagree more.

 

Marc's a top bloke. WAP button. Marc's a top bloke.  (Names Billy not silly)

 

 

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You guys have no idea. I should post up some of the PMs and Emails I get multiple times per day.

 

Some, perhaps 25%, I don't respond to but actually go and remove their account. It takes longer to do that than it does to have replied to them - but the lack of courtesy and in fact, disrespect shown tells me we don't want them in our community. Just dealing with them now is easier than dealing with them later.

 

Anyway, I am sure we are all on the same page with this. It's a direct result of social media IMO. But, come here with a social media attitude and you won't last long.

 

I encourage members to hit Report on the PMs received that show disrespect, serious lack of manners, or anything else you think needs to be brought to my attention. For every 5 members we remove each day, 45 others will register in their place. We may as well call them out and weed them out.

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9 minutes ago, Marc said:

You guys have no idea. I should post up some of the PMs and Emails I get multiple times per day.

 

WABS button pressed.   Pfft. Facepalm. I'd post them up but they all come from Eggmiester and Sir Zingerlinga and occasionally Bohdi asking back in.

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Funny you should mention that Wally. In my recent attempt to try and sell my streamer and psu I had 3 folk reply. All dropped out with no reason given and didn't even do  me the courtesy of letting me know till I contacted them to find out what was going on.

Strange days !

Edited by Ozcall
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12 minutes ago, muriwai said:

Bit harsh??

 

Perhaps, but after 20 or so years my patience is running out with those who think StereoNET access to this free resource is a right, rather than a privilege.

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1 minute ago, Ozcall said:

Funny you should mention that Wally. In my recent attempt to try and sell my streamer and psu I had 3 folk reply. All dropped out with no reason given and didn't even do  me the courtesy of letting me know till I contacted them to find out what was going on.

Strange days !

 

Strange days indeed mate....................... to those of us fortunate not to have social media participation hard wired into our cognitive process.

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10 minutes ago, Marc said:

Perhaps, but after 20 or so years my patience is running out with those who think StereoNET access to this free resource is a right, rather than a privilege.

I’ve always thought SNA should have a small charge associated when you join. Maybe $5 - $10 a year Then I bet you will only get the dedicated members joining.  I have noticed that so many members just use the classified’s  and never donate when they sell something.   As for rudeness.   Just unacceptable ?

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